Monday, November 21, 2011
One of these days
I'm actually going to care. I hope today is the day. But probably not. I'll be back though. I can promise you that.
Monday, November 7, 2011
Dang Halloween
Why is it that I always have a place to lay blame for my love affair with junk food??? It's my own fault that I can't control myself. What am I going to do? I lost 5 lbs but I'm sure I've put it back on. I don't even dare to step on the scale. Ugh. What's it going to take?
I was thinking today about how much weight I've lost in my life. I probably weighed around 125-130 when I got pregnant with my first baby. I remember saying that I would never get over 160 with any pregnancy or otherwise. That lasted for a few kids, then it went to 165. Then 175... You get the picture. So now here I am, seven months out from kid #7 and I'm almost 15 lbs heavier than my original "never gonna go over this" weight!! AGH!
Lets do some math: say I weighed 140 when I got pregnant with Jace. (That's actually now a happy & healthy place for me to be...) so if I averaged a 30 lb weight gain and loss on every kid - maybe I hovered right around 130 -140 for the first few then 140 -145 for the more recent years - that means SEVEN times I've gained 30 lbs and SIX times I've lost it again... adding up to a total of 180 lbs that I have lost and now another 30 to go! Holy Crap that's a LOT of weight!!! No wonder I feel like a freaking yo-yo. Up and down and all over the stinking scale. Losing the weight in between babies is getting HARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So is it Halloween's fault? No. I guess not. and it's not the babies' fault. It's just my own. But still...
I was thinking today about how much weight I've lost in my life. I probably weighed around 125-130 when I got pregnant with my first baby. I remember saying that I would never get over 160 with any pregnancy or otherwise. That lasted for a few kids, then it went to 165. Then 175... You get the picture. So now here I am, seven months out from kid #7 and I'm almost 15 lbs heavier than my original "never gonna go over this" weight!! AGH!
Lets do some math: say I weighed 140 when I got pregnant with Jace. (That's actually now a happy & healthy place for me to be...) so if I averaged a 30 lb weight gain and loss on every kid - maybe I hovered right around 130 -140 for the first few then 140 -145 for the more recent years - that means SEVEN times I've gained 30 lbs and SIX times I've lost it again... adding up to a total of 180 lbs that I have lost and now another 30 to go! Holy Crap that's a LOT of weight!!! No wonder I feel like a freaking yo-yo. Up and down and all over the stinking scale. Losing the weight in between babies is getting HARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So is it Halloween's fault? No. I guess not. and it's not the babies' fault. It's just my own. But still...
Thursday, October 27, 2011
Stats
Weight: 170.6
BMI: 28.4
Well, it seems like longer than a week has passed since I last checked in. I am doing terrible. I mean, I'm fine and all, but my goals taking me towards "healthy and happy" aren't being met because of my ... what, I don't know... lack of willpower, laziness, obsession with ice cream... AGH! It's a miracle that my wight has remained steady because my eating and sleeping habits the past 2 weeks have been HORRIBLE! What am I going to do? How am I going to stay on this train????
BMI: 28.4
Well, it seems like longer than a week has passed since I last checked in. I am doing terrible. I mean, I'm fine and all, but my goals taking me towards "healthy and happy" aren't being met because of my ... what, I don't know... lack of willpower, laziness, obsession with ice cream... AGH! It's a miracle that my wight has remained steady because my eating and sleeping habits the past 2 weeks have been HORRIBLE! What am I going to do? How am I going to stay on this train????
Friday, October 14, 2011
Stats
Weight: 170.2
BMI: 28.4
Haven't been keeping track of what I eat so falling back into old habits. Need to do better. Trying to find willpower to do so. Shouldn't looking in the mirror be enough?
BMI: 28.4
Haven't been keeping track of what I eat so falling back into old habits. Need to do better. Trying to find willpower to do so. Shouldn't looking in the mirror be enough?
Tuesday, October 11, 2011
Stats
Weight: 170.4
BMI: 27.6
The past week has been a wreck. I'm not exercising like I want to, not getting enough sleep or water and not eating all that great. I'm not doing too whipy at tracking my food intake either, and hadn't stepped on the scale in a few days so this morning I was expecting the worse when I weighed myself. I was very surprised and happy to see that I had dropped below 171 and my goal for the week is to do better and try to get into the 160's! Here goes nothing!!!
BMI: 27.6
The past week has been a wreck. I'm not exercising like I want to, not getting enough sleep or water and not eating all that great. I'm not doing too whipy at tracking my food intake either, and hadn't stepped on the scale in a few days so this morning I was expecting the worse when I weighed myself. I was very surprised and happy to see that I had dropped below 171 and my goal for the week is to do better and try to get into the 160's! Here goes nothing!!!
Friday, October 7, 2011
Thursday, October 6, 2011
Wednesday, October 5, 2011
Tuesday, October 4, 2011
Chocolate chips
Darn them. They are too good. But I'm definitely eating way fewer calories than I was even a week ago, so I'm not doing too bad. And I'm waking up earlier, which is one goal that is working out for me. I haven't been for a walk yet this week, but I did play volleyball for mutual tonight, so I'll have to count that as a little exercise. It may have canceled out about three of those chocolate chips. I saw Bro. Goody at church tonight. Can't believe that guys has lost over 130 lbs. Totally inspiring! I will stick with it and drop my 40 if it kills me!!!
Monday, October 3, 2011
Well, dang
Not the best day ever. Didn't get out to exercise and I really wanted to go for a walk tonight. It was raining earlier and SO fantastic outside! The temps are just right and I'm sad I didn't get out the door... but mommy duty called and I had to be with my babies... and my laundry. Plus it was conference dinner. How do you even keep track of what you eat at conference dinner, let alone count calories!?!? I tried really hard not to go overboard, and I think I was fairly successful. If only Halee wouldn't have brought doughnuts. I'm a sucker for those bad boys. So, yeah, not the best day ever. Hopefully tomorrow will be better. I'll let ya know.
Sunday, October 2, 2011
I'm back!
Well, it was a rough, but wonderful weekend. Even though it's no excuse, having my computer down was extra hard on my efforts to eat well... I didn't have DietPower or my blog to help me out. Darn. Plus it was conference weekend, which means treats, etc. Mark was in town for the BYU vs. USU football game, which meant lots of food. And Bill was out of town running the St. George marathon, so I didn't' get any exercise time in. Double Darn. Yeah, so it wasn't the greatest.
But I've had a few little miracles (like getting the computer running again and seeing Mark down 45 lbs!!!) that leave me ready to get some good sleep tonight and jump back on the bandwagon tomorrow. I have a feeling that weekends are going to continue to be rough, but let me just say that I am SOOOOOOO grateful that my computer is working again. I know it shouldn't make that big of a difference, but it does.
So until tomorrow.... current stats and maybe and exercise report. I'm considering starting P90x already. Do you think I'm ready???
But I've had a few little miracles (like getting the computer running again and seeing Mark down 45 lbs!!!) that leave me ready to get some good sleep tonight and jump back on the bandwagon tomorrow. I have a feeling that weekends are going to continue to be rough, but let me just say that I am SOOOOOOO grateful that my computer is working again. I know it shouldn't make that big of a difference, but it does.
So until tomorrow.... current stats and maybe and exercise report. I'm considering starting P90x already. Do you think I'm ready???
Friday, September 30, 2011
Wednesday, September 28, 2011
Tuesday, September 27, 2011
Empowering
Today was great! Even though I have written a million posts and it's only day 1, I really feel great about how things are going. It felt really good to get all of my thoughts unleashed onto paper (print!) and I think that writing everything down really made my day go better.
I went over my calorie allotment by a couple hundred calories, but I also passed up chocolate cake for peaches and ate a much smaller portion for dinner than I normally would. I'm obviously up past my "curfew" but I'm planning on getting up early anyway. So I am happy with how the day ended. I hadn't planned on getting any exercise in, but after YW I actually was able to go for a 2 mile walk/jog/waddle! It was wonderful. I love feeling like I can make a difference in my own health and am excited to give this gift to myself. Here's to tomorrow!
I went over my calorie allotment by a couple hundred calories, but I also passed up chocolate cake for peaches and ate a much smaller portion for dinner than I normally would. I'm obviously up past my "curfew" but I'm planning on getting up early anyway. So I am happy with how the day ended. I hadn't planned on getting any exercise in, but after YW I actually was able to go for a 2 mile walk/jog/waddle! It was wonderful. I love feeling like I can make a difference in my own health and am excited to give this gift to myself. Here's to tomorrow!
Goals
Ok, so I know I can't get where I want to go without knowing where it is I want to be! Get that?? :-) Haha! So I need to start off with setting some goals for myself. This is the basic structure of my fitness plan - start with goals, then make an outline of what I'm going to do to accomplish these goals. As I sit here and write this, my mind immediately goes to YW Personal Progress... I am 2nd counselor in the YW pres. and am always encouraging my girls to work on the goals in that program because I know it will bless their lives. I think it's noteworthy to point out that the PP program is based on setting small goals to accomplish an overall, larger goal, which leads to even grander end results if progress is continued to be made. This is a pattern for life in general, and specifically in different areas such as physical, spiritual, mental, financial, etc. This concept of setting goals is not a new one, for year after year, we make "resolutions" to become better people in any given aspect of our lives. In the big picture, I will not be able to return to live with my Heavenly Father if I don't take the small daily steps necessary to complete my journey to eternal life. I have to follow the plan already laid out for me, make my choices based on my knowledge of right and wrong and set goals for myself to help me reach my destination. That is a whole separate blog!! haha! And in the smaller, narrower vision of my physical self, I am going to set some attainable goals for me to help me in my quest for overall health and happiness.
So, here are my general areas of interest:
1. Food/Water
2. Exercise
3. Sleep
These are my three main focus areas. Now I need to narrow down my ultimate goals and the baby steps I am going to take to get me there.
Hmmm. Today when I stepped on the scale I weighed 177 lbs. For me, this is not ok. I know I just had a baby, but I am done with looking like I'm six months prego. I would love to weigh 135 lbs. I don't know if that's possible for me, though. I would probably be happy with 140 and I might even settle for 145, even though I think I can do better than that. To me, the number isn't the very most important thing, but how I look and feel about myself is a pretty good indicator of where I want to be. I need to accept reality that I'm never gonna have my 18 year old body again, but I can have a nice looking, fairly-firm, middle aged, mom-of-7 hot bod!! So yeah, I'll settle for whatever weight that happens to be. But I'm gonna shoot for 140.
Ok I know that this one basic formula is do or die in trying to gain/lose weight:
Caloric Intake < Calories Burned = Weight Loss
You HAVE to burn more than you eat, or you won't lose weight. I have had success in the past tracing my calories with a computer program called DietPower. It's not really a diet, but rather a way to food journal. You tell it what you eat and how much you weigh and it tells you how many calories to eat in order to meet your weight loss goal. I am going to use this program again, because I really like it and it always works for me... well, as long as I do what it tells me to! haha! My big thing is portion control, because, let's face it... I LOVE FOOD! I'm never gonna give up sugar and I'm never gonna go health nut crazy and only eat organic weeds. I really do love food, and I want to eat it and be happy. That being said, I do love fruits and veggies, so that is a great thing, especially right now when fresh produce season is in full swing! However, I do love breads, sweets and anything chocolate, too, that's where my challenge lies... Eating what I like, just not too much of it!
So for my #1 Food/Water baby step, I'm going to use DietPower to track what I eat and stick with the caloric intake that it recommends. It also gives guidelines for water intake, so I think I'll just try to drink as much as it tells me too.
It goes without saying then, if I know how many calories I'm eating, I need to be burning more than that each day. I can just eat less than I need, or I can earn extras by exercising. Lucky for me, I really enjoy working up a good sweat and I love the feeling of being sore after I've had good hard work out. Two years ago when I did P90x with Chris and Steph, I felt so good and even worked up a few little muscles in there! That is what I really want to do again, but I'm not sure I'm ready for it. For #2 Exercise baby step, I'm gonna start by walking 4-5 times a week for two weeks and then I'll reevaluate this area.
#3 Sleep. hmmm... what can I say? I don't get enough and would LOVE to get more. I think this is going to be a huge challenge for me, even though it should be the easiest of all! I am a sleep girl. I NEED 8-9 hours each night to be running at full speed, which is where I would love to be every day. Not gonna happen, I know, but I've got to try. My mind, body and soul all perform at their peak when I get a good night's sleep. So why is it so hard? Not sure, but I want to change that. Actually, when I stop and think about it, I do know why... I have some very precious time from the time that my kids go to sleep til the time that I go to sleep. It's called quiet time and I get a TON of stuff done during those few quiet moments. I hate to give them up. But I think I need to trade in the quite hour at night for a wake-me-up work out in the morning. I have to get up earlier. I know it'll make my whole day better if I do. So what will I change? Baby step #3 is lights out by 10:30 for me, preferably 10 pm, and rise and shine at 7 am. I'm gonna try to get my exercising in during the hour after Bill and McKayla leave but before the girls get ready to go. That should work well. We'll see, though, eh? :-)
So there ya go... It feels good to get that in writing and be able to see my goals in front of me. I'll do a reacap for myself somewhere else, but here's my goal:
40 lbs baby!!!! gonzo......... by when????? I put Jan 1st in Dietpower, but that's eating 1390 calories a day and losing 2.5 lbs per week. I'd love it, but I'm not gonna die I don't make it, because we're going into the big 3: Halloween, Thanksgiving and Christmas!!!! wow!!! That time of year!! Awesome time to try to lose weight, don't ya think! Yahoooooooooooooo!!!!!!!! Here I GO!
So, here are my general areas of interest:
1. Food/Water
2. Exercise
3. Sleep
These are my three main focus areas. Now I need to narrow down my ultimate goals and the baby steps I am going to take to get me there.
Hmmm. Today when I stepped on the scale I weighed 177 lbs. For me, this is not ok. I know I just had a baby, but I am done with looking like I'm six months prego. I would love to weigh 135 lbs. I don't know if that's possible for me, though. I would probably be happy with 140 and I might even settle for 145, even though I think I can do better than that. To me, the number isn't the very most important thing, but how I look and feel about myself is a pretty good indicator of where I want to be. I need to accept reality that I'm never gonna have my 18 year old body again, but I can have a nice looking, fairly-firm, middle aged, mom-of-7 hot bod!! So yeah, I'll settle for whatever weight that happens to be. But I'm gonna shoot for 140.
Ok I know that this one basic formula is do or die in trying to gain/lose weight:
Caloric Intake < Calories Burned = Weight Loss
You HAVE to burn more than you eat, or you won't lose weight. I have had success in the past tracing my calories with a computer program called DietPower. It's not really a diet, but rather a way to food journal. You tell it what you eat and how much you weigh and it tells you how many calories to eat in order to meet your weight loss goal. I am going to use this program again, because I really like it and it always works for me... well, as long as I do what it tells me to! haha! My big thing is portion control, because, let's face it... I LOVE FOOD! I'm never gonna give up sugar and I'm never gonna go health nut crazy and only eat organic weeds. I really do love food, and I want to eat it and be happy. That being said, I do love fruits and veggies, so that is a great thing, especially right now when fresh produce season is in full swing! However, I do love breads, sweets and anything chocolate, too, that's where my challenge lies... Eating what I like, just not too much of it!
So for my #1 Food/Water baby step, I'm going to use DietPower to track what I eat and stick with the caloric intake that it recommends. It also gives guidelines for water intake, so I think I'll just try to drink as much as it tells me too.
It goes without saying then, if I know how many calories I'm eating, I need to be burning more than that each day. I can just eat less than I need, or I can earn extras by exercising. Lucky for me, I really enjoy working up a good sweat and I love the feeling of being sore after I've had good hard work out. Two years ago when I did P90x with Chris and Steph, I felt so good and even worked up a few little muscles in there! That is what I really want to do again, but I'm not sure I'm ready for it. For #2 Exercise baby step, I'm gonna start by walking 4-5 times a week for two weeks and then I'll reevaluate this area.
#3 Sleep. hmmm... what can I say? I don't get enough and would LOVE to get more. I think this is going to be a huge challenge for me, even though it should be the easiest of all! I am a sleep girl. I NEED 8-9 hours each night to be running at full speed, which is where I would love to be every day. Not gonna happen, I know, but I've got to try. My mind, body and soul all perform at their peak when I get a good night's sleep. So why is it so hard? Not sure, but I want to change that. Actually, when I stop and think about it, I do know why... I have some very precious time from the time that my kids go to sleep til the time that I go to sleep. It's called quiet time and I get a TON of stuff done during those few quiet moments. I hate to give them up. But I think I need to trade in the quite hour at night for a wake-me-up work out in the morning. I have to get up earlier. I know it'll make my whole day better if I do. So what will I change? Baby step #3 is lights out by 10:30 for me, preferably 10 pm, and rise and shine at 7 am. I'm gonna try to get my exercising in during the hour after Bill and McKayla leave but before the girls get ready to go. That should work well. We'll see, though, eh? :-)
So there ya go... It feels good to get that in writing and be able to see my goals in front of me. I'll do a reacap for myself somewhere else, but here's my goal:
40 lbs baby!!!! gonzo......... by when????? I put Jan 1st in Dietpower, but that's eating 1390 calories a day and losing 2.5 lbs per week. I'd love it, but I'm not gonna die I don't make it, because we're going into the big 3: Halloween, Thanksgiving and Christmas!!!! wow!!! That time of year!! Awesome time to try to lose weight, don't ya think! Yahoooooooooooooo!!!!!!!! Here I GO!
Why?
So I stayed up last night past 1 in the morning reading the blog of my neighbor who has successfully lost over 100 lbs and is healthier than ever. It was so inspirational I knew that I could do the same. Well, I don't need to lose that much, but I do need the accountability that comes from recording my progress.
This blog is a way for me to track my progress, stay motivated, record ideas and things that help me along my way, and just be a safe place to share my feelings. I honestly don't know if I'm even going to tell anyone about it, even though that kind of is counterproductive to the idea of accountability... but I kind of think just getting my thoughts out of my head might be enough of a jump start to keep me headed in the direction that I want to go. Maybe I'll tell some people. I don't know... or perhaps some will stumble upon this page in their surfings, because I do have a link from my family blog. Anyway...I don't know... But I do know that I need to do this for me. So here I go.
This blog is a way for me to track my progress, stay motivated, record ideas and things that help me along my way, and just be a safe place to share my feelings. I honestly don't know if I'm even going to tell anyone about it, even though that kind of is counterproductive to the idea of accountability... but I kind of think just getting my thoughts out of my head might be enough of a jump start to keep me headed in the direction that I want to go. Maybe I'll tell some people. I don't know... or perhaps some will stumble upon this page in their surfings, because I do have a link from my family blog. Anyway...I don't know... But I do know that I need to do this for me. So here I go.
It's time to be honest
Well, here I am. It has taken me quite a while to get to this point... to face the music and be honest with myself. To be ready to commit to better health, to be willing to care about what I eat, and to long for the feeling of strength that comes from exercising my body.... my poor body. I've not treated it well lately. I feel badly about that. But it's tough on a mind and a body - gaining 30 lbs every other year, then standing at the foot of the huge mountain that comes after the birth of a baby - knowing I HAVE to get that baby weight off yet feeling rather overwhelmed and discouraged by the amount of work and effort I know it's going to take.
My 7th child is almost 6 months old. Right now I weigh at least 10 pounds more than I did when I delivered my first child. Aahh those were the days! I have done a decent job of getting the weight off in between each baby, but it's getting progressively harder and my increasing age is not making the task easier. But I have to. I know I don't want to look like this. It's not me and I'm sick of how I look and feel. My closet is not a happy place right now and I feel like a blob whenever I get dressed. I hate finding clothes each day. My only pants are my maternity jeans, and honestly they are too small. My shirts are too tight and I hate the look of my flabby rolls poking through the fabric. It's not attractive at all. I refuse to buy bigger clothes because, #1 - I can't afford it, and #2 - I DO NOT want to be that size!! So I resort to wearing baggy t-shirts and shorts that do nothing for my feelings of frumpiness. Ugh.
The other day I was having a conversation with myself and it finally hit me when I said to myself, "Sara - NO ONE is going to do this for you. Bill cannot exercise for you and nobody is going to eat right for you. The only person who can help you is YOU!" I keep coming up with excuses and justifications for my behavior (kids, busy life, yada yada yada) but in reality, I have to do this by myself. And I know that, but every time I stand before this hurdle, I have to realize it all over again. And every time it takes a good long look in the mirror to get myself in gear to make this commitment. It's so not easy. I'm kind of crying because I know it's a long haul that is probably going to end with another pregnancy weight gain and I'll have to start all over again in two years. But I have to try. I have to do it anyway. I can't give up, give in, quit. I won't.
It's time to be honest with myself. It's time.
My 7th child is almost 6 months old. Right now I weigh at least 10 pounds more than I did when I delivered my first child. Aahh those were the days! I have done a decent job of getting the weight off in between each baby, but it's getting progressively harder and my increasing age is not making the task easier. But I have to. I know I don't want to look like this. It's not me and I'm sick of how I look and feel. My closet is not a happy place right now and I feel like a blob whenever I get dressed. I hate finding clothes each day. My only pants are my maternity jeans, and honestly they are too small. My shirts are too tight and I hate the look of my flabby rolls poking through the fabric. It's not attractive at all. I refuse to buy bigger clothes because, #1 - I can't afford it, and #2 - I DO NOT want to be that size!! So I resort to wearing baggy t-shirts and shorts that do nothing for my feelings of frumpiness. Ugh.
The other day I was having a conversation with myself and it finally hit me when I said to myself, "Sara - NO ONE is going to do this for you. Bill cannot exercise for you and nobody is going to eat right for you. The only person who can help you is YOU!" I keep coming up with excuses and justifications for my behavior (kids, busy life, yada yada yada) but in reality, I have to do this by myself. And I know that, but every time I stand before this hurdle, I have to realize it all over again. And every time it takes a good long look in the mirror to get myself in gear to make this commitment. It's so not easy. I'm kind of crying because I know it's a long haul that is probably going to end with another pregnancy weight gain and I'll have to start all over again in two years. But I have to try. I have to do it anyway. I can't give up, give in, quit. I won't.
It's time to be honest with myself. It's time.
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